February 08, 2003

Bread and Circuses

We're going to war, John Ashcroft wants to wear jackboots in public, and the economy is tanked. So what trio of news stories just aired on KPTV?

1. Hiring a hooker in California could result in your car being seized.
2. A town in Alaska celebrates something called the "Duct Tape Ball."
3. Pay phones are being phased out around the country.

For those unfamiliar with the phrase which occupies this item's title, it is a plural noun defined as follows:

Offerings, such as benefits or entertainments, intended to placate discontent or distract attention from a policy or situation.

It seems that the only use left for local news broadcasts is to become fodder for people with weblogs like this one. Forgive me. It's a slow day, and I'm having serious writer's block as I try to draft a Portland Bill of Rights Defense Committee press release.

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